General Topics

Oh noo Its been a while

Tue, 01 Apr 2025 04:52:06 GMT

How Fast does time fly?

It has been a while since I posted here, and man, time flies. The youngest just turned 6, and the oldest is graduating this year. The 8-year-old is a wiz at science and math, and I'm hoping to get him into the camp that will help him flourish. The girls are doing cheerleading, and the boys are looking for jobs. I am proud of how far I have brought them, but its currently been getting to a point where my 2 middle children are tuning me out, and I have been trying for some time now to get them to turn around some of their behaviors because it can cause them to stunt their lives and progress.

I am still studying my languages, got a little sidetrack with the issues in life but I still want to be a polygot in Asian Languages. I also speak Spanish basics. I have my keyboard set up for random play. Can't wait for the summer to get here.

Making going to the gym a consistent part of my schedule, Aries trio just had their birthdays. They are the best. Coming up next is the Trio of Geminis, who don't know what they want for their birthday.

I miss South Korea; it's like I haven't been home in a while, but I need to get my ducks in a row.

A New Shirt was posted in the store with more to come. See you next week!

Updates (including Christmas)

Fri, 23 Dec 2022 05:10:37 GMT

Updates (Including Christmas 2023)

Its been a rough month. Christmas is coming up. This job is insane with the hours because it open enrollment for Medicare so I don' t have the free time to post every two weeks likes I would like to. So for the next couple of months, I will be putting up a new blog post once a month, just giving updates on parenting and children and new ideas for The Nabi Effect.

So we are starting to make Shirt designs. I have alot of quotes that I have written that I think would look good on t-shirts or sweatshirts so I am going to invest in a cricut and learn how to make shirts. I want to make mugs also but thats for another day. The ebooks are coming together nicely but I struggle with the issues of perfectionism, so I keep making them available and then I take them back down. I am working on it, but my sons are willing to ware my shirts and advertise them for me, makes me exicited plus my bestie is also making her own clothing brand so we are helping each other.

The kids are excited about Christmas, I am stressing because it is just me and they are getting to the point where everything is expensive that that want. So we have come up with the plan that they will pick two expensive items, and then everything else will be essentials and 5 below items which they are okay with.

Shanelle's Birthday and Thanksgiving

Sat, 19 Nov 2022 04:56:54 GMT

Shanelle's Birthday and Thanksgiving

Happy 13th Birthday Shanelle,

So I am back home from SK, alot earlier than I wanted to be but hey thats life. There were more pressing things at home I needed to deal with so here I am. Never put anything before your children and family is something I stand firmly upon. Planning Thanksgiving dinner and how we are going to celebrate the teenage years rolling in my 3 child and 1st daughter. She is tough cookie but I wouldn't trade her for the world.

Understand that running or starting a business is not for the weak, if you are looking for an instant influx of money, it may not happen that way. I have been working on this business for over a year now and I am still learning because Marketing skills are something that I am lacking. I have the content, and the products just unsure how to get it out there and also I am worried about people being receptive of what I talking about, but one day at a time. I will make it.

Headed home - Itaewon Tragedy

Fri, 04 Nov 2022 05:12:25 GMT

Heading Home and Itaewon tragedy

Enjoy this beautiful picture of the Cheonggyecheon River (청계천) my favorite walking spot. It used to be highway but was turning into beautiful area that you can walk and enjoy the scenery through downtown Seoul.

As the title says, heading home. I had to cut my trip short due to the chaos at my house. My eldest child had some community service and classes that he needed to complete but was not done. I apparently didn't schedule a doctors appointment for Jeremiah. And apparently disrespect is happening between my friend who is staying at my place while she gets on her feet and the children's father. I assumed this would happen but was hoping not.

Another reason I am going home is because tragedy struck on Halloween over here and the lost of life was great. Mentally it is taking a toll on me because you can feel it in the air. The greiving for lives lost, trying to locate everyones families and just the suffering of the country at this moment. It was a really bad accident, in an area that is usually crowded but not like it was for halloween.

I have so many phone calls to make when I get home, I need to check on paperwork for Josiah. Do Parent/Teacher Conferrences for the other 3 ( Joseph, Shanelle and Jeremiah). I talked to the kids every other day while I was here and they are okay, its just I like things to run smoothly and they are not. My house comes before anything else so I must go home. I am sad to go because its only been a couple of weeks and it cost me more to get here than anything else. But I must return and get things back in order. I probably won't make it back for a while because I need to purchase new furniture and re-do my house and start a-fresh in 2024. Starting school back up so that I get my degrees in order, I also have a couple of certifications I want to complete to help me learn marketing for my business.

"Remember a Toxic Enviroment can only thrive if you allow it to, remove people no matter who they are and Guard your peace at all cost"

SK and concerns

Fri, 21 Oct 2022 04:42:44 GMT

SK and Concerns

So I will be headed back to South Korea soon for the winter. I plan on making this a yearly thing as long as my finances allow. There is a lot going on at the house at the moment and I am wondering if it is still a good idea to go but I already brought my flight ticket which was way more expensive then last year. Flight cost have gone up a lot. I love going to South Korea, eventually I will make it to Japan, China, Taiwan and Thailand. growing my business is taking a little longer than I planned but hopefully it takes off soon.

Parenting at this time seems to be getting harder not easier. I have 3 teenagers and two littles. The 3 and the 6 yrs old seem to be easier to deal with than my teens at the moment.

Josiah is currently enrolled in a online charter school which he requested but it currently struggling. Joseph and Shanelle are still at Innovative Arts Academy, Joseph has started the school year off strong but Shanelle is dragging her feet. Jeremiah started 1st great this year, he loves math but not writing and reading. And then my lovely 3 yrs old, likes to draw and color.

Most people don't understand or accept the way that I choose to parent. I was raised by very loving parents, who did use physical discipline when I was wrong. Can I say it only effected me negatively, NO!. It taught me boundaries and to hold myself accountable if I didn't want to get into trouble. Can I say I never hit my children, No!, but do I choose not to now? Yes, because I don't want them flinching at my hands or anyone elses. I have a pattern to my parenting and big part of it is consistency. They know what to expect for the behaviors that they do. They know the consequences also, but the problem I can say I having a hard time teaching them self-accountability. Such as holding themselves accountable for their actions, thinking before they act because they know and understand the consequence of what is about to happen. Instead they choose to do it anyway.

Yes, I get frustrated, yes I want to yell and scream but guess what it is going to fix. Nothing! So I just dish out the consequence and keep it pushing.

Online School Battles

Fri, 07 Oct 2022 19:49:01 GMT

Online School Battles

So, it's been about 30 days since we started online school with the eldest teenager. And I am telling you, it is not for the weak. I was homeschooled growing up because I needed a challenge that regular school wasn't given me, but I was focused. I didn't need anyone to tell me to do school every day. This kid on the other hand because he has the choice to go to live classes or just do the school work later, has been slacking off. So it has become a job instead of just getting his education. I personally didn't realize the amount of motivation and dedication you need to go to school online. I just do it, so I thought it was that way for everyone but then I remembered my sisters struggled a little bit because of the freedom you have with your schedule and required timelines.

Little bit of advice if you are thinking about doing online schooling/homeschooling.

If your child struggled in in-person school, with motivation and focus, it will be more complicated at home because they won't have the other students and teachers to keep them on task.
Depending on the online school you select, it is really hard to fail. Everything is recorded. They can rewind the videos and if they are still unsure of the content, they can message their teachers in a chat.
Stay Involved. Help out when you can, make it fun. Especially if you have a child who struggles with staying motivated. Find opportunities to work together. You do something important and include the schoolwork
Acknowledge and reward. I provide special treats or a couple of dollars to the store for harder assignments once they get graded.
Always remember, that grades don't equal to effort but with online school you can always request a reset of the assignment (depending on the teacher) if you want them to try again.

Sisters Birthday and Education Changes

Thu, 22 Sep 2022 04:45:15 GMT

Sisters Birthdays and Education Changes

I didn't write about this in the previous post because I was talking about my birthday but my oldest son is now enrolled in Online Schooling, I am wanting to see how this goes. He has been struggling for the past couple of years because he has a processing disorder and bullying. When I offered this as an alternative, he said "I'll try. I work from home so this is a wonderful time to start this process. He is in 10th grade, only 2 years left. A lot of his goals and dreams have changed over the years and I am not sure if it is because of negativity from those around him or just teenage things. I have asked him about it, waiting for him to clarify.

2 of my sisters share a birthday with me in September and we get together every year to make memories and celebrate. This year we are going to a R&B only concert that is like 3-4 hours of nothing but R&B music. I am looking forward to it even though I and the second oldest of the 4 of us (Daisy) tend to clash when we get around each other but I am willing to try every year. We may never see eye to eye but we do have fun after the initial altercation. Ebby, we are similar but different in a lot of ways. We think similarly but I have a wider range on how I handle and perceive things, which might be the couple of years I have on her. She is amazing, and I love talking to her about topics that I know we are going to have a different opinion but when we get finished talking we just move on. LOL. Happy Birthday Ebby and Daisy. Another year down, let's keep moving forward.

My Birthday and Next Steps

site-YFsodw — Wed, 07 Sep 2022 03:56:23 GMT

My Birthday and Next Steps

September 6th is here again. Another year older, I think the difference between last year and this year was that I accomplished something that I thought was impossible. I was able to travel to South Korea not once but twice. I am headed back in November for another 90 days. It was amazing and I actually miss being over there but due to my children being in here the US. I come back and forth, it's worth it. They get to spend time with their father and I get still to study, write, build a business, and travel the world.

This was a complex situation because so many people were against it and that is due to the fact that in this society we live in, a mom still chasing her goals and dreams is considered selfish. The question I kept getting was "You just abandoned your children " and in my head, I was like, they are with their father. We are not together and he is allowed to have them also. This is not a one-person job even though I have been doing most of it by myself up until this point when I decided that he should be able to have them for a while also. They don't always have to be with me and maybe, I was giving him the misunderstanding that he had a choice on being an active participant. We don't have to be together for him to be active, not just a bystander. But that is a message for a different post.

Year 36 and I am slowly recovering from this relationship, but moving forward in some of my other goals and dreams. Keep an eye out for me on Social Media promoting my business and brand.

Happy Birthday - Life Choices

site-YFsodw — Fri, 26 Aug 2022 03:42:51 GMT

Happy Birthday and Life Choices

Happy Birthday to a beautiful 6 yr old boy, Jeremiah. As he gets older, I will continue to teach him how to love and care for others while also protecting his own heart and peace. He is a very emotional creature and I allow him to cry and show his emotions while teaching him the correct way to express them. I believe this is essential in the world today, that our sons and men are emotionally intelligent and aware.

As this title says, Life Choices. I look back sometimes and realize that there are some choices and decisions that I would have done differently if I have accepted myself for who I was. I went through a long phase of wanting to fit in with others and be excepted which I am not saying is a bad thing everyone goes through it. I just wish I had come out of it earlier than I did. I struggle immensely with making people like me. Not understanding that I was giving all of these different people control of my life and that I was not in control nor was I happy. So over the last 3-4 years I have been working on myself and understanding that people may never like me but as long as I love and am happy with myself, eventually, I will attract people who do like and accept me for who I am.

Making these changes in how I see myself along with changing my self-care routine, I have learned more about myself. I talk to my children often about accepting themselves or no one will accept them because they are not happy with themselves.

Gossiping - Idle Talk

site-YFsodw — Fri, 12 Aug 2022 01:48:04 GMT

Gossiping and Idle Talk

The body content of your post goes here. To edit this text, click on it and delete this default text and start typing your own or paste your own from a different source.

Horizontal Relationships Vertical World

site-YFsodw — Fri, 08 Jul 2022 04:56:44 GMT

Horizontal Relationships in a Vertical World

This is a short post just touching on a very important subject that means a lot to me.

We are taught to build vertical relationships with everyone. Where were we are always in competition, someone is better than the other. We are always worried about how to get ahead, looking down on others who are struggling in life and wishing for the downfall of people doing better We feel that we are entitled to tell people how to live their lives based on our standards. What we don't understand is that they don't have to listen. They can live their lives their way and if you don't like it, you can walk away. Instead we choose to stay around and spew hatred and dislike for them enjoying or destroying their life. There is only so much you can do. This is something that needs to change.

When building health horizontal relationships, we are all walking the path of life going the same way. We aren't trying to control how each other lives their life. We offer advice only when asked for it and encouragement and support when needed. Because if you do anything other than that, you are trying to make them live their life the way you would live yours and that is not your place.

There can be unity in our differences, instead of this agenda where we can only be united if we all think the same.

Staying Positive

Thu, 23 Jun 2022 04:13:49 GMT

One Positive Thought A Day

Lets talk about the last couple of weeks .

Being transparent helps everyone understand that what I am trying to teach is an active process. I am still using the process that I am sharing with the world. Since I have been home, my teenagers have switched roles. So my 15 yr old, does everything that he is told. He sleeps a lot but when he is awake and I ask him to do something it gets done. My middle two kids who are 14 and 12 act a lot like their father and choose to give me a hard way to go. The 12 yr old, my daughter is not verbally disrespectful but stubborn and does not follow directions well. My 14 yr old is the one that I have been really struggling with. He is easily influenced by others and like to make everyone happy. His grandmother has influenced him a lot. He listens to his father, but give women a hard time.

The process of correcting this behavior is redirection and elimination, so he receives consistent redirection. It is immediate because he does not hold his tongue or watch what he says. And sometimes when you ask him what he just said he cannot even repeat it back to you, because he is going with the flow. I don't do physical punishment, so if redirection does not work, I take stuff away. Gaming privileges, going outside, cell phone and allowance. I am not asking for perfection, just effort to change the behavior and this process has been working so far. We still have a uphill climb because unfortunately between me, his father and grandparents, what offends us is different and they are not bothered by certain behaviors that I strive to change so that he does not get hurt in the real world.

Now lets talk about the 3 and 5 yr old. They talk a lot and like to negotiate different things, so I starting using the counting method with them to make them understand that I am serious. When we are outside of the house, I don't yell, I use a low tone and get down on their level. They understand that I am not happy with them and apologize. I ask them if they know why I am not happy because I want to make sure they understand. The 5 yr old is getting better at explaining himself but the 3 yr old is still learning, but I am teaching responsibility and accountability.

Leave a comment below if you have any questions.

1st week home

site-YFsodw — Mon, 06 Jun 2022 01:56:53 GMT

1st week home

The First week home was uneventful. Sleeping was the best friend due to me being jet lagged. Next I started checking emails to see if we were going back to work on June 5th, unfortunately our furlough was extended till August 8th. I was really upset about this because I had some plans and things I wanted to get done this summer that Unemployment is not enough for. Also we were having a problem with the child care so the Youngest two munchkins were staying here at the house with me. I went out today to get all that corrected.

I found a job at the kids daycare which is not the best but it will work till I go back to work in August. Today I need to figure out how to get a TB Test done and a physical. Josiah got into some trouble so I had to set up a couple of meeting to figure out how we fix this. Joseph graduated from 8th grade so I have my second High schooler. There are clothes everywhere in this house that I have to rewash and put away. Its seems like grandma is causing some problems that I also have to resolve.

I posted this story on my tiktok also, but before I started traveling I talked to my teenagers and they were okay with me enjoying life. They stay with their dad, we talk consistently and when they need something I make sure they get it. I am not one to follow society rules and I think its stupid that women get penalized for still wanting to be women. Yes, we have children and have become mothers but that does not stop us from still having hopes and dreams like everyone and we should be able to pursue them even with having kids. That is why there is supposed to be two parties responsible and if we deem dad capable of taking care of his own kids, it makes no sense for it to be doubted.

Headed Home

Sun, 29 May 2022 03:58:29 GMT

Goodbye Again, South Korea

Today is May 28th, and sadly it's time to fly out of South Korea. I made two new friends while I was here. Yes, they are both males, and they treat me with respect.

Savannah and I had a falling out while we were here, and we did patch it up, but it is still not the same as it was. I spent my last two weeks going to a study cafe and spending 5 hrs there. I eventually found a free 24 hours cafe and was out all night. It was fun. I got to see my first street performance done by different college groups.

I am happy to go home and spend the summer with the munchkins and make lots of money selling my books. I had to order new business cards because the phone number has changed. I have people recognizing me on TikTok, I am not ready, but I am prepared. I have to meet with one of my friends to work on the lyrics to 2 songs.

Finishing up my Emotional Intelligence Certificate and Positive Psychology Course.

Each certificate takes me closer to my goal. I have to finish putting together my Thai study plan because I plan to go there this fall.

Missing my Keyboard, ordered a lot of sheet music while I was away. I am planning on taking piano lessons to learn how to read sheet music. I play the piano by ear but never learned to read sheet music.

2 weeks later.......

Sun, 15 May 2022 03:19:38 GMT

2 weeks later ....

2 Weeks Later.....

So launching my website wasn't a complete failure, but it wasn't a complete success either. I realized that self-promotion is more complicated than I thought. So back to the drawing board. I realized that I would have to overcome my fear of being in front of the camera and use my resources to pull people to the website and social media pages.

Over the last couple of weeks, I completed the outline all nine e-books. I started putting the poetry book manuscript through the process of being professionally edited so that I could finally put it online. I have people waiting for a copy of this book, so I need to complete it. They didn't realize that putting everything into a specific order drove me insane. That is why it took so long for me to complete the initial process of just getting the table of contents complete.

My blog is a mixture of different topics that focus on building my business and the thought process behind many things that I do. How is co-parenting going with a complicated partner? If you want me to blog about specific topics, leave them in the comments, and I will cover them.

Co-Parenting in Seoul

site-YFsodw — Mon, 25 Apr 2022 04:04:20 GMT

Co-Parenting in Seoul

Coparenting in Seoul has been an experience. My children are doing great in school, except for the 5yrs old. He is still having issues with him being impulsive and he gets really upset at time and lashes out. I have contributed the fact that he does not like to be ignored. It is really hard to teach a 5 yr old that not everyone is going to listen to him, right now. But I understand his frustration, he doesn't like his stuff touched and at time he does not want to play with anyone. When someone ask him a question and he gives an honest answer he expects it to be followed. So if he is playing alone which he does a lot and someone ask to play with him and he says No, he expects to be left alone. When that does not happen he does get upset and sometimes throws things because he feels like they are not listening. This is complex because I want him to interact with others but I also want him to be listened to when he says something. So we had to have a meeting about safety because he has almost hurt a couple of people when he gets upset, he does feel remorseful after and comes back to apologize but at the height of his anger, he can be dangerous. The 3 yr old, has grown into a beautiful verbal butterfly who says what she wants when she needs to, but is also a cuddle bug.

Some of the behaviors that you have seen me talk about in previous post with the teenagers has not changed. They still don't come home at the time they are supposed to and then get upset when they cannot go outside for 2 days but that is the consistent consequence for their actions. I just make sure they understand that the punishment is not going to change and when their friends show up looking for them I tell them they didn't come home on time so they cannot come out. I talk to the teenagers every couple of days just to check in but I truly believe that if I didn't call, they wouldn't reach out. They are my biggest supporters in what I am doing. I cannot wait to give them my business card and flyer to take to their school counselor.

Lets end this talking about self-promotion. Self promotions is harder than I thought but I am going to start going live 2x a week on Facebook and Instagram. Posting tik tok videos 4 times a week and I do have some promotions going on with the e-books and I plan on giving away a few autographed poetry books for people to read and share with everyone.

Next Step

site-YFsodw — Mon, 11 Apr 2022 04:48:37 GMT

Next Step

I did my first coaching session today with a classmate and it was a lot easier than I thought it was. She explained her concern and helped her with some suggestions and solutions to work on with the concern. I need to publish my website and start doing promotions to drive people to my site. I will be truthful I am so worried about it not doing well. I am finishing up the E-books and still creating the calendars so the store is not up yet but I am hoping by the end of April to have everything in the store to start scheduling appointments May 1st.

My language study skills is going okay. I have added Thai to the list. I realize that I need to create a schedule and stick to it or I may never progress at the speed I know I am capable. Its been really hard to stick to a schedule because I am so used to multitasking everything. But since I want to ask dance and musical instrument classes to my schedule I need plan around that stuff. Also I have to make a Social Media schedule to post business content and promote my website and books. When I get back this Summer, I have a piano audition for piano class because I need help learning to read sheet music. I have been playing by ear for years but I have some songs that I want to be able to put music. Poetry writing is going okay. I am starting to be able to write poems when I am calm. I used to write poems at when my emotions are high. Inspiration to write, draw and sing usually come in the early hours of the morning which is why I am up so late most days.

Talked with my children over the last couple of days. Trying to get them to understand that I don't say "No" because I don't want to give them the world but because at that time I really don't have what they are asking me for. Plus I want them to understand that everything is not free. There is a cost for everything. This seems to be the toughest lesson to teach at this time. I think I am going to add another e-book about teaching money and responsibility, not sure this yet. Working on a children's book about being kind, I need a artist for the pictures. I am thinking about asking my Son (14) and my sister to work together on the pictures. I have to finish the outline of the story first.

Everything I gave is on halt at the moment because I have to write when I am calm, that story stirs up a lot of emotions because I have to recall past memories, its based on a lot of truth but it will have some things added.

March 22nd

site-YFsodw — Fri, 25 Mar 2022 19:13:19 GMT

March 22nd, 23rd, 24th - Special Post

March 22nd is the 3rd Birthday of a beautiful butterfly by the name of Sherilyn. She is a fascinating little girl with a beautiful old soul. I truly believe at time she has walked this earth before just based on the way she does things. She likes things clean, she is bossy but loving and clingy at the same time. I am sure her siblings may say different, she is rather rough with them. LOL

March 23rd is my new bestie Savannah birthday. She has been a joy to get to know and figure out. This was the first birthday I got to spend with her. We went out and took pictures, had a meal and enjoyed ourselves. We have been talking for 6 months over discord and finally we get to meet each other. And though it may seem like we clash at times, I wouldn't trade her for the world.

March 24th - My ride or die. We have been together since my 3rd child. She has been my babysitter, my confidant and friend. Even though we have our ups and downs. Sometimes we don't talk to each other for a while, we respect our space but end the end, if I ever need her, she will come running and I will definitely always be available for her. She is the aunt to my children and the godmother to Sherilyn. They are so much alike and I love it.

My 3 Aries Women - Strong Powerful and the Best Friends I could ever have.

Back in South Korea

site-YFsodw — Fri, 11 Mar 2022 19:44:55 GMT

Back in South Korea

Just got out of Quarantine for 7 days and it wasn't that bad. I studied my Korean and talked to the kiddos most of the time. They are the best and I enjoy seeing them happy even if I am not there.

That little butterfly of a two year old is slowing showing her personality and she is a feisty on. She like to be in control and yelling now. She still doesn't cry a lot which I guess is a good thing, communicates a whole lot more. The 5 yr old is adjusting well to Kindergarten. He struggles with sitting all day but he likes to learn. His teachers says that he brightens up the room. They like living with their dad. I have had consistent and frustrating conversations with different people who don't understand how I can let them live with their father. The way I see if that I didn't create them myself so he can raise them also, I wish we could do it together but it didn't end up that way.

Lets talk about my teenagers. The 14 yr old, my oldest and first born is quiet but deadly. He behaves but subtlety resist. I have to catch him in the wrong or he would seem like the perfect child. The 13 yr old.- will do anything i ask him with a price, he is always trying to negotiate his price on everything. I started giving him an allowance because he is having an excellent school year. I just wished he talked nicer, but he likes to mimic his father a lot and has a hard time understanding what is offensive and what is not. I believe this is due to the fact that we talk so different and I think about every word that comes out of my mouth. I have tried to teach this but to no success. I believe that this is due to the fact that outside of the house it is not something that is corrected and a lot of the youth and young adults talk this way. Lets talk about my 12 yr old. I won't call her my problem child but she gives me a good run for my money. She is really smart but the worries about things like weight, be pretty and fitting in. She is a beautiful girl with a bright personality. But she is pretty nasty when dealing with her peers. I don't know if they start it first or not but I hear some of the things she says and its very mean.

The reason I am sharing this is because I don't want anyone to think I am the perfect parent. Everything that I am sharing with the world and other parents is based on what I have learn as a parent myself and also in the 20 yrs of working with Teenagers with my father. Things that I use on the regular basis, to get there I am now. I'm never going to tell anyone that it is easy but with consistency and redirection we can turn around a lot of the behaviors that not just the children and teenagers have but the way we adults treat each other.

February Update

Sat, 19 Feb 2022 18:52:52 GMT

February, February, Love and Life

I have been putting together my next South Korea trip, because I only planned on being home for about a month or 2 so I am headed back out at the end of the month. This time I have company. My friend Savannah. We have been talking and spending time for about 6 months and formed a good friendship.

Working with the kids to get caught up on their school work because they have been slacking off, but it seems to irritate me more and they still slack off. I need them to understand that education is key to a happy life, but it doesn't seem to be registering. I sit and do work with them, we usually enjoy the time but they won't keep up with it.

I have finished putting together the outline for my poetry book which I have also decided would include, quotes and short stories that I have written. I have been trying to post consistently online about my business but I have not made a business page on Facebook because it links back to my website that it is not yet published. I still have to complete my Coaching Classes which didn't realize how fast the time went on completing it and now I am behind. I was given a teddy bear by my ex and I gave it too my daughter. I just don't want to blur the lines and give him any impression that we can get back together.

I keep pushing back launching my business because I have a fear of success/ or the unknown. I am confident in what I wants to share and help this world with. I believe that my books will sell and that I will have great success in my mentoring with youth and young adults, I just have to get out of my own way literally.

Back to the USA

Mon, 31 Jan 2022 11:54:50 GMT

Back to the USA and Children

I left South Korea on January 17th and even though I looked forward to see my children, I was still sad to go. I cried at the airport and was a little sad on the flight back but I knew I would go back so I calmed down. When I get back home, I am staying with my sister for a week just to spend some time because I am flying into Philadelphia.

I got into the city, and waited for my sister and niece who are the best family. We got to talk about different issues and the kids. I called the kids and let them know that I was back but everyone in the house was sick. I was not going to go home because I didn't want to get sick but I really didn't have a choice. My sister took me home on Saturday. When I got home I found out that all teenagers, and their father had COVID19. So I quarantined the entire house for 10 days but on Wednesday I myself got sick.

I don't wish COVID on anyone, after dealing with the fever and headache that it gave me. What was worst was keeping the 2 yrs old at a distance. She would not leave me alone. I was literally sleep for 12 hrs and she was sitting right next to me the teenagers said. She would not move. I woke up and was feeling a little better so I put her in her bed.

The rest of the month was uneventful except I realized that a lot of the behavior that I was dealing with from the teenagers hasn't changed. They still prefer to listen to their father over me and want to come to me only when they want something. I am no longer taking it personally because I know what I have done for them and I hope they understand that no matter what I have their back. I have taught them well and they are making their own decisions at the moment. I still redirect them, correct them and tell them how they can change it but at this time I believe that they control which parent they want to deal with. The two and the five year old are growing into amazing people under the care of their father, us sharing them has been a positive more than a negative.

It's Getting Cold

site-YFsodw — Thu, 13 Jan 2022 02:25:24 GMT

Its December 2021 - The end of the year

December 31st, 2021

Its the end of the year and my website is supposed to be launching tomorrow and I just realized that I did not put together pricing for my packages and service. I was also not finished with writing the eBooks. I have a poetry book that I still need to put together. Making sure that I have 20-30 poems which would make this book about 35 pages when I believe is good. I started to get overwhelmed because I remember that I also am leaving in about 10 days so I have to get all of my stuff packed, figure out how to get to the airports. I can't believe I brought so much stuff while I was here. I have brought so many books. Decided that I am going to also start learning Japanese and Mandarin(Chinese) which is challenging my brain power. I also have a ton of Coursera courses that I signed up for. They are all personal advancement.

I am planning on coming back to South Korea around the end of February. My website should be up by January 31st. I have to get the rest of these books complete. OMG. I have gotten tired lately because I really don't want to go home but I am looking forward to seeing my kids and family. I have a few personal matters that need to be handled before I leave again like putting my stuff in storage. Making sure that my oldest is settled where he wants to be and also getting the legal part of my business established so that I can open a business bank account for when money starts rolling in.

See you in the New Year everyone. We are aiming for the sky in 2022. 새해 복 많이 받으세요

Thanksgiving and more

Fri, 26 Nov 2021 16:30:59 GMT

Thanksgiving and More

November 26th, 2021

My first Thanksgiving in South Korea. I had Chicken and Rice for dinner. The website is stressing me because I want it to be perfect but we all know that perfection does not exist. Perfection is an illusion. I had my two best friends look at the website and they stated it is good enough to publish. I made some changes to it and decided to type my journal entries to share the process I have taken to get this website up and running. I don't want to act perfect because I am not, I have figured out ways to do this that have proven over the years to be beneficial to all of the children and parents who's lives I come into contact with.

I run a language server with some friends where we are learning Korean. I am also slowly integrating Mandarin (Chinese) and Japanese. My eldest Son is wanting to learn Japanese so I am researching the most successful steps for him to successful also. My 12 yrs old wants to learn Korean but I am unsure what dedication she is willing to put into it. My Younger two are 5 and 2 yrs old. The 5 yrs old likes speaking Spanish and the 2 yr old likes learning random Korean words. When I get back home for 30 days I am going to play Korean learning videos for them and see how they pick up the language.

My Coaching class this week was a bit hard, we touched on a topic that required me to dig into some spots in my heart that I tend to ignore due to the fact that I don't quite understand my own emotions as well as I understand others. I had to talk about the struggles I had in getting over the only relationship I ever had. And the on going battle I have with myself on why people feel they can treat me any less than I deserve. That is when I came across a saying that how people treat me is a reflection of them not a reflection of me. That is when I realized that I can treat people like gold and if they turn around and treat me poorly that is not a reflection of myself but a reflection of them.

Daegu, SK

sites@tailorbrands.com — Fri, 12 Nov 2021 13:40:28 GMT

Daegu, South Korea

November 13- Day 4

I have spent the last 2 weeks exploring my surrounding. This country is amazing. I need to focus on my studying so that when I come back I communicate efficiently. There is so much to see and not enough time to do it because I am still working my regular job even though I am over here. I am hoping that by the time I come back I can focus on getting clients and building this business. I believe the eBooks are my best option at making a consistent flow of income. During that time I can make newsletter with topics, suggestions and games that parents and teenagers can do together. Also Younger Children.

I have been working on keeping myself motivated and believing in myself. Most people may not know it but I have a fear of Success. I want to make it as far as possible and change the world but I am afraid of what such success could do to me. I find joy in helping others. Every time I explain the foundation of this business to others, they all encourage me to run with it. Chase it as far I can. I am great with building up others, but over the last 2-3 years I have been working on balancing myself.

I can't wait to start working with parents, teenager and anyone else that may come my way because I believe learning to respect each others emotions, words, actions and even ideas is the best way to turn this selfish world around. Everyone is solely focused on themselves and are raising children the same way. It needs to change because we were made to work with each other, lean on each other and need each other in different ways, And right now that is hard to deal with because we don't give each other the basics of respect.

Work, Work, Work

Fri, 29 Oct 2021 12:41:17 GMT

Work, Work, Work

Day 3 - October 29th

Quarantine is over on Sunday October 31st and then I can head to my apartment in Daegu, South Korea. I am sure a lot of you are wondering how I ended up here after saying that I have 5 children. Well I made a decision after talking to my teenagers. They have been giving me a hard time lately and we sat down and had a heart to heart conversation. They pointed out that they wanted to see me happy. They know I am happy being with them but they want to see me doing some of the things I always talking about. So I asked them if I switched roles with their father, if he came to live with them and I visited. How would they feel about it? They did not have a problem with that because I have been the one raising them for the last 14,13,11 yrs. So when I told them I was planning on taking a 3 month trip to South Korea, they helped me pack my stuff and said Go!. Once I had talked to them, I had the courage to let everyone else know of my plans. Their father was not onboard at first but eventually he came around. This first 2 weeks weren't really hard because they call me when they want to see me on video. The younger two are so happy to have their dad around and seeing them happy lets me know that I didn't make a bad decision.

Progress with The Nabi Effect - Being in South Korea has giving me a peace that I haven't felt in a while and a drive that I needed. I have made some changes to my business that I hadn't thought of. I was originally focusing only on Teenager and Young Adults but I realized that the message that I am sharing and pushing for can be used in younger children also. Emotional Intelligence can be taught at any age. Writing the eBooks is taking a lot of time because I have to make sure I stay on point and not stray away from the book. I am also planning on making some motivational calendar for Teenagers and Young Adults to help with Motivation.

Day 2 How is it going

Fri, 15 Oct 2021 11:37:25 GMT

Day 2: How is it Going

Today I researched coaching schools and found a program that I could afford. And I found one so I am working towards my coaching certification even though it is not necessary, I like to show that I have had some sort of training and direction in the path I am taking. I am still trying to find scholarships and grants to complete my college degree. There is so much stuff that I would still like to learn and experience even though I am 35. Sometimes it hard because I would love to have people behind me cheering me on but that is not the case. I have 5 children 3 teenager and two little people who are amazing. I am putting my all into raising them but at time it seems like I am not enough. I enjoy being their mother, just wish that I had more free time to chase try all of the different talents that I have been blessed with. I won't say that they are in the way, they are the reason I work so hard, but I wish I had a more supportive circle. My kids cheer me on and love watching me work. I'm sure all moms feel the same way. I am hoping that I am able to climb higher and higher with this business. I have decided that for the next 5 yrs till I am 40 yrs old I will try everything that I am capable of doing. Singing, writing poems and songs, learning 2-3 other languages, playing all my instruments and building my business. I had people ask me why would I want to do all those things. And I make sure people understand that I am not looking for fulfillment, just want to cross it off my list. Also I have started traveling. This is my first week in South Korea, I am doing Quarantine.

Day 1: It starts

Fri, 01 Oct 2021 11:38:31 GMT

It Starts - 10/01/2021

Today was Day 1 of building this business. I knew that I wanted to name it the Butterfly effect. This is a long process in the making. For years I have been working with children and young adults helping them with different aspects of their emotional and motivational growth. When working on this business, I have worried if some of the things that I am talking about will make a change or cause more problems. I didn't realize till I became a parent myself just how flawed some of the thought processes are when people deal with children and young adults. So I decided that I would focus on respect, positive reinforcement, teaching responsibility and accountability. I also decided that I would open my doors for parents of younger children between the ages of 2-12. I can see this business growing to help a lot of people if I focus on it the right way and provide the services that I believe are needed within the parenting, teen and young adult community. A change is needed and I am going to make it happen.

See you in 2 weeks with a progress update and maybe something extra.